The idea that a holiday is supposed to be a day off from work seems to be lost after the hostess as been cooking a turkey since 5am, and relatives had to slog through hours of traffic or long lines at airport security. Why not just approach the table as any other meal, but with more family members, than try to assemble the perfect sage-stuffed, wine-paired Thanksgiving?
Of course, the other major holidays seem like a mere lead-up to Christmas and Chanukah. The masses are in a desperate frenzy while searching for the perfect gift. A hapless shopper finally falls into a tear-stained muddle at the cash register, as she buys a generic pair of slippers for her father, since she was unable to find a tennis racket from his favorite manufacturer. People, spurred on by the consumption encouraged by advertising buy gifts strangers, from the mailperson to their garbage man. The idea of shopping as a sales-driven 'sport' is reinforced by the creation of pseudo-holidays like 'Black Friday' or 'Cyber Monday' where the amount of people heading to the malls for discounts, or online to find great sales, has become a required cultural right of passage. How many Christmas gifts are really memorable? Maybe the longed-for bicycle (or iPod) for a child, but once someone gets a bit older, what is really remembered is the time...
The day itself, after so much anticipation, almost invariably falls short. Also, perhaps because Americans are moving farther and farther away from their families, and losing a sense of family tradition, they seem more intent on looking at the media and
culture to tell them how they should feel and celebrate a particular day. The result is neurotic perfectionism. One of the most enjoyable holiday experiences I had was celebrating the New Year with a Russian Orthodox friend of mine. The New Year is more important in the Russian Orthodox calendar and is a kind of combination of Christmas and New Years. Because everything was so different, from the foods, to the songs, to the tradition, I had no expectations of what was going to happen next. Because this way of celebrating a winter holiday was not of my culture, or much talked-about in the media, there was no pressure upon everyone to 'perform' and to be 'perfect.' However, I still felt moved, and reflective, because of the emotions of the people around me, and the weighty sense of the passage of yet another year, traditionally observed in 'the old way.' I think this was a good lesson, and from now on it is the attitude I will use, when approaching any celebration, great or small.
